Should y’all at Chapel Ridge be concerned?
Though twenty years late, we all knew that it was probably only a matter of time before Ken sunk into mid-life crisis.
After an hour of waiting on the curb, I caught up with him in the parking lot of a Mexican Restaurant BAR in Anderson, South Carolina on Thursday. He was confused and disoriented but as we all know this is normal and has nothing to do with the consumption of alcoholic beverages. Ken was his giddy self, talking wildly about not being able to find me. He said that his GPS was not functioning properly – searching for words he exclaimed that he was driving a car with an older model of GPS so it could not locate the restaurant. Look at this automobile. Now, I ask you, does this car look like it would have an older model GPS?
I resentfully said, “Ken, this restaurant is on North MAIN Street! North MAIN Street, Ken. What can be so difficult about finding MAIN Street? I have not asked you to meet me on Katzabutchee Drive.” Yet Ken wandered around Anderson for an hour so I finally called him on his cell phone to see if he was in Anderson, Anderson SOUTH CAROLINA? I thought that he might have gotten lost in Atlanta, or Chicago or even New York but then he finally pulls into the parking lot. This cad, all smiles and giving me lame excuses about traffic and GPSs’.
Let me advise my many friends at there at Chapel Ridge – you really need to sit down with him, close the door (put someone by the door, preferrably someone double his size), lock it and have him account for this episode. Better yet, put Linda by the door with a rubber hose in her hand. You might even consider the possibilty that you will have to resort to the waterboarding interrogation techniques for this one. Ken can be (as we all know) a little shifty.